Saturday, November 28, 2009

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

~*~Now a Days Online Chatting~*~

Here is something interesting...

Our FRIEND(Hero) WAS chatting with a female - Online chat.
Background both are s/w engineers by the way and both work for real big MNC's



Hero : Hey...GM (Good Morning)... How's u doing today?

Female: VGM...Day is going good and it got better having found u on chat



Hero : wow...am honored, u know what, my day starts only when I find you on Chat

Female: Yep...me too feel the same...Brb (be right back)'ll get some Coffee.

Hero : OK
(Hero waits impatiently. Meanwhile, his manager comes to his seat.)


Manager: Hey, I need some help from you

Hero : [**** This guy always comes at wrong time] Yeah tell me


Manager: Could u write a program for me which generates nth prime number, Given value of n. Would you give this by today evening?


Hero : I would do that, but I think it's quite hard, is it ok with you, if I Give it by tomorrow evening.


Manager: Yeah, that would be fine. Thank you [Leaves the place]

(Our hero sighs and stares at his monitor waiting impatiently for Female to Arrive. 
 
All of a sudden smiles on his face. Over to chat window...)

Female: Hey, am back

Hero : cool, you know what my manager does, She's kinda..... keeps asking stupid Things, tries to give me stupid work

Female: Yeah, it's the same everywhere. Real sick ppl these managers are!!

Hero : Yep, u rite!!

Female: Hey, can u do me a favor

Hero : *smiles* sure, why not.

Female: Hey, I want you to write me a program to print nth prime Number, given N. Would you give that to me by tomorrow evening? Plzzz. You know it's real Urgent for me to work this out


Hero : hey, that's a one-hour's work. Sure check Ur mail in an hour from now. ok?


Female: THIS IS WHAT I ASKED U WHEN I CAME TO YOUR WORK PLACE. NOW YOU KNOW WHO I AM!! AND ONE MORE POINT.... YOUR 1 HOUR TIME STARTS NOW!!

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

~*~A.G. Sunte Ho?~*~

"A.G."


Yeh Biwiyan apne pati ko "A.G." kyon kehti hain?
 
Kyonki Biwiyan Sanskari hoti hain; 
aur sabke saamne "Abey Gadhe" nahin keh sakti. Isliye, short form main bulati hain "A.G.".

Saturday, September 5, 2009

~*~Fun Time~*~

 
  Sardar: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre girl: sir, just dial 123to know current bill status 
Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.
 
 

Doctor to patient: You will die within 2 hours. Do you want to see any one before you die?
Patient: Yes. A good doctor..
 
 

Q: How do you make a sardarji laugh on Saturday?
A: Tell him a joke on Wednesday.
 
  

Sardar: I think that girl is deaf..
Friend: How do u know?
Sardar: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals are new
 
  

Friend: I got a brand new Ford IKON for my wife!
Sardar: Wow!!! That's an unbelievable exchange offer!!!
 
  Teacher: Which is the oldest animal in world?
Sardar: ZEBRA
Teacher: How?
Sardar: Bcoz it is Black & White

Judge: Don't U have shame? It is d 3rd time U R coming to court..
Sardar to judge: U R coming daily, don't U have shame?
 
  

Question: "Should Women have Children after 35?"
Smart Sardar Replied: "No!
35 Children R More than Enough!!"


Sardar attending an interview in Software Company.
Manager: Do U know MS Office?
Sardar: If U give me the address I will go there sir.
 
 (Best one)
Sardar got a sms from his girl friend:
"I MISS YOU"
Sardarji replied: 
"I Mr YOU" !!.
 
  
After finishing MBBS Sardar started his practice. He Checked 1st Patient's Eyes, Tongue & Ears By Torch & Finallly Said:
"Torch is okay"
 
Sardar1: Oye, what will happen if electricity is not discovered?
Sardar2: Nothing, we must watch TV in candle light.
 
Sardar in airplane going 2 Bombay .. While its landing he shouted: " Bombay ... Bombay "
Air hostess said: "B silent." 
Sardar: "Ok.. Ombay. Ombay" 

Teacher: "What is common between JESUS, KRISHNA , RAM, GANDHI and BUDHA?"

Sardar: "All are born on government holidays...!!!  


  Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple ?
Sardar: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

~*~Ek Din DiLLi me.....~*~

एक दिन दिल्ली मे.........

एक दिन
मैं दिल्ली पहुँचा
स्टेशन पे एक कुली से बाहर जाने का रास्ता पूछा
कुली ने कहा ' बाहर जाके पुछो '

मैने खुद ही
रास्ता ढूँढ लिया
बाहर जाके टेक्सी वाले से पूछा
भाई साहब लाल किल्ले का कितना लोगे?
जवाब मिला बेचना नही हे

टॅक्सी छ्चोड़ मैने बस पकड़ ली
कंडक्टर से पूछा जी क्या मे सिगरेट पी सकता हू?
वो गुर्रा कर बोला हरगिज़ नही यहा सिगरेट पीना मना है
मैने कहा पर वो जनाब तो पी रहे है
फिर से गुर्राया कहा... उसने मुजसे पूछा नही है

लाल किले पहुँचा , होटेल गया
मेनेज़र से कहा मूज़े रूम चाहिए . सातवी मंजिल पे 
मेनेज़र ने कहा रहने के लिए या कूदने के लिए?
रूम पहुँचा वेटर से कहा
एक पानी का गिलास मिलेगा?
उसने जवाब दिया नही साहब , यॅन्हा तो सारे काँच के मिलते है

होटेल से निकला , दोस्त के घर जाने के लिए
रास्ते मे एक साहब से पूछा
जनाब ये सड़क कहाँ जाती है?
जनाब हंस कर बोले पिछले बीस साल से देख रहा हूँ,
यन्हि पड़ी हे.....कही नही जाती

दोस्त के घर पहुँचा तो मूज़े देखते ही चौंक पड़ा
उसने पूछा कैसे आना हुआ ?
अबतक तो मूज़े भी आदत पद गई थी
मैने भी जवाब दिया ट्रेन से

मेरी आवभगत करने के लिए दोस्त ने अपनी बीवी से कहा
अरी सुनती हो....मेरा दोस्त पहली बार घर आया है
उसे कुच्छ ताज़ा ताज़ा खिलाओ
सुनते ही भाभी जी ने घर की सारी
खिड़किया और दरवाजे खोल दिए
कहा ताजी हवा खा लीजिए

दोस्त ने फिर से बड़े प्यार से बीवी से कहा
अरी सुनती हो...इन्हे ज़रा अपना चालीस साल पुराना आचार तो दिखना
भाभी जी एक बाल्टी मे रखा आचार ले आई
मैने भी अपनापन दिखाते हुए भाभी जी से कहा
भाभी जी आचार सिर्फ़ दिखाएगी . चखाएगी नही?
भाभी जी ने तपाक से जवाब दिया यूँही अगर सब को
चखती तो आचार चालीस साल पुराना कैसे होता ?

थोड़ी देर बाद देखा भाभी जी
अपने पोते को सुला रही थी
साथ मे लॉरी भी सुना रही थी
डिप्लोमा सो जा डिप्लोमा सो जा
लॉरी सुन मे हेरान हुआ और दोस्त से पूछा
यार ये डिप्लोमा क्या है?
दोस्त ने जवाब दिया मेरे पोते का नाम
बेटी बंबई गई थी डिप्लोमा लेने के लिए
और साथ मे इसे ले आई
इसलिए हमने इसका नाम डिप्लोमा रख दिया
फिर मैने पूछा आजकल तुम्हारी बेटी क्या कर रही है ?
दोस्त ने जवाब दिया बंबई गई है डिग्री लेने के लिए 


not mine

Friday, July 17, 2009

~*~Fun with Wrong email ID !!~*~

Wrong email I D : 

A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. 

However, he accidentally typed a wrong e-mail address, without realizing his error, he sent the mail. 

Meanwhile... Somewhere in Houston , a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral. 

The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting condolence messages from relatives and friends. 

After reading the first message, she fainted. The widow's son rushed into the room, 
found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read: 

To: My Loving Wife 
Subject: I've reached 
Date: 22 Feb 2009

I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here, and we are allowed to send e-mails to loved ones. 
I've just reached and have been checked in. 
I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. 
Looking forward to see you TOMORROW!